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I found this on cruisercustomizing.com. I hope they don't mind me posting it here.

You might be a biker if...

...You carry around a crushed beer can so your kickstand does not sink into the asphalt on a hot day...

...Your bike is cleaner than you are.

...You've forgotten the names of half your old girl friends but can remember each model ever made by your favorite brand.

...You refer to your hair-do as "helmet hair".

...You first memorized the alphabet from the letter "F" because that's where the names of most Harleys start.

...You believe that Arlen Ness has been canonized by the Pope.

...You have taken a vow not to use deodorant until they make a deodorant for motorcycles.

...You believe that the human body is kept alive by 32psi pf air pressure.

...You measure your age in tread wear.

...You've finally become OK with the Harley Edition Ford truck, but when it comes to a Ford edition Harley, No Way!

...You believe that the first car was created by Carl Benz when he nailed two BMW motorcycles together

...You know the different bug species by how they taste.

...Your bike is a mixture of every color you hated in high school.

...You can understand the purpose of spending $25,000 for a piece of two-wheeled rolling art, but think art collectors who collect paintings that just hang there are crazy.
 

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...you owe more payments on your bike then you do for your house.
 

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If your CHROME purchases are more than your house payment!
 

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IF YOU TALK TO YOUR SCOOT MORE THAN TOO YOUR OL' LADY!


IF YOU HAVE EVER HAD A MOTORCYCLE IN YOUR KITCHEN OR LIVING
ROOM!


IF YOU HAVE EVER CALLED IN SICK TO WORK BECAUSE THE WEATHER
WAS PERFECT FOR A NICE LONG RIDE!


IF YOU KNOW WHAT DILLIGAF MEANS

IF YOU WOULD RATHER RIDE YOUR "BIKE" BEFORE ANY OTHER MEANS
OF TRANSPORTATION
 

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You ever started your bike during a Eulogy a mile away and everyone could hear it.
 

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- Your wife has ever asked you to move the bike so she could see the TV better.
- You have ever had to borrow a helmet for your date.
- Your best friends are named after reptiles.
- You own more black T-shirts then underwear.
- Taking your wife on a cruise means a putt down the interstate.
- Sturgis is your dream vacation.
- You ever quit a job to go to Sturgis.
- You only took the job to pay for your trip to Sturgis.
- Your only three piece suit is a leather jacket, leather vest and chaps.
- Your ol' lady can only eat a hot dog if it's suspended from a string above your bike.
- You buy your 3-year old niece a honda t-shirt.
- You can identify bugs by taste.
- You think BLACK & ORANGE would make nice house colors.
- You think GOD invented winter just as a good time to get your bike painted.
- People know your a biker even when you don't want them to.
- One of your children or pets have either "Harley" or "Davidson" in their name.
- People have nearly died of starvation looking at all of your bike/run pictures.
- Over half the pictures you take have your bike in it.
- You stare longer at the pictures of the bikes in Easyriders than the naked women.
- You don't go a day without wearing something that says "VTX".
- The weather is too bad for riding and you start your bike and sit on it in the garage.
- You get hit by a car, break your leg, then tell the nice police officer, "I'm fine I can ride home".
- You see no use in going to a bar without bikes in front.
- You dream of owning a Honda dealership.
- You have a refrigerator in the garage just for beer.
- You pile boxes and laundry on your car, but your bike must have 6 feet or clearance in the garage.
- Everytime you hear a vehicle with headers you look for a Honda.
- When you plan a vacation you set up time to visit the bike shops first.
- You have all the tools to work on every Honda ever made, but not any to work on your ol'ladys car.
- It's impossible to see out of your car or trucks rear window because of all the Honda stickers.
- You refer to your bike as if it had a legal first name
- You have a heater in your garage so you can work on your bike(s) when it's cold.
- Your Christmas list has no words, just part numbers.
- Every magazine you subscribe to has the word "Biker" on it somewhere.
- One area of your house (other then the garage) is decorated in a motorcycle motif.
- Everytime you spend money, you think about what you coulda bought for your bike.
- They celebrate your birthday at HDL store.
- You think 'Helmet Hair' is a fashion statement.
- You encourage your kids to go to the Motorcycle Mechanic's Institute instead of college.
- Your dog and your wallet are both on chains.
- You fainted when you met Willie G.
- Jack Daniels makes your list of "most admired people".
- You've spent more on your motorcycle than your Education
- You have at least one ashtray which is actually a motorcycle part.
- You think that the HONDA VTX plant should be one of the 7-wonders of the world.
- When she says "It's the bike or me!!" you have to think about it really hard.
- You spend more time polishing your bike than caressing your woman
- You have more locks on your bike than you do your house.
- Anyone who doesn't ride is just 'ok'.
- You can think of at least ten things we forgot on this page.
 

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Seriously,

My son asked me who I loved more, my children or my bike. I told him I love you all.

He persisted and wanted to know who I loved more, my children or my bike.

All I could tell him was that some questions should not be asked as he migh not like the answer. He smiled and changed the subject.!!!

We kid alot. But was I kidding????
 
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